Mirror Mirror: A Reflection of Honest Love

Healing has its own time table.

It is true that time heals wounds but I can say if you move along with time, the #healing moves much faster. And at times, I believe we have to sit and just be. Let that quiet space speak to you. I have learned to stop rushing myself in a world where everything is instant or immediate. Sometimes that slower pace is just want you need to process things. The #clarity shows up unexpectedly.

In the past weeks, I had an old trauma resurface and rear its head. As I strongly believe, you are not responsible for the trauma that happened to you. Your healing is your responsibility.

The first step to getting what you want is getting rid of what you do not. That includes bad habits, bad people, bad things, and bad thoughts. Give it all up. When you shine light onto darkness, it is about choosing love over fear. When you hold back the truth, you make fear more important than love.

• Styling: Mirror outfitted from Hobby Lobby l Chair from The Barn

The depth of your love is always mirrored by the depth of your honesty.

I have a pure heart and my world mirrors that. I choose love, that deep love for myself, for God, for grace and forgiveness. I work through trauma so that it does not linger and flow out of my space. I am fortunate to have a space to unpack those emotions. It is here. It is in the gym. It is in my sessions. It is in conversations with my dearhearts.

It has been years since I have been in a toxic relationship but I would not be here without those painful experiences. I also have come full circle to counsel and comfort broken hearts who battle, are dealing with or experiencing the same damage I knew too well. It is far easier to use your challenges to understand others and empathize the struggles and disappointments because we all value #compassion and #encouragement.

We are all deserving of love, success, financial security, friendship, and bottomline #happiness. But if you do not believe you are deserving of these things, then do not expect them to arrive at your door anytime soon. Having a sense of unworthiness will not let good things in. You are not perfect, but no one is. Learning to love yourself opens a door to good things though. So if you ever feel alone, discouraged or do not think anyone understands, please do not. I promise I will be there to catch you, pick you up and lift you. We are all equally positioned to either help or be helped ♥

Sorrowful Longing

The landscape is littered with broken hearts.

Most of us do not want to think about the what-ifs. We do not want to consider failure.

You need to forgive yourself and allow yourself to heal. You still have more incredible memories to make. You still have new trustworthy people to meet. You still have plenty of days to laugh, to remember, to cherish, to keep in your mind forever. You are still young and have so much room to grow and so much opportunities ahead of you.

I do not know how big the sorrow is inside your heart. I would guess it is quite big. Although as each day goes by, it will get smaller. Each day it gets smaller, the smaller the sorrow will become, each day a bit smaller. Then it will become a longing. Our sorrow eventually becomes a longing.

• In Lady Gaga's famous lyrics, it's buried in my soul like that California gold. Everyone can use a happiness vitamin.

• Location: San Clemente, CA

You do not need to be perfect to be ready. You just need to be ready. Break ups are hard. Break ups are a gut punch. Getting involved in a new relationship after a break up takes time and you need to heal and do some emotional work. But you do not need to be perfect. Once you unpack and find who you are, you get a do-over. You can choose to get what you need and give what you want.

Accepting the fact that you loved someone is much harder than falling for that person. It takes time. It takes courage. But when you finally take that time, find the courage and let your guard down, you discover something spectacular. To create a world together and fill it with laughter and smiles, it is like a happiness vitamin. You take it every day to ensure you sleep, eat and live well. You can do it. Thanks to love.

The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.

Life is like that. You cannot rush things nor can you slow them down. So many of us try to spend so much energy to control life and it cannot be controlled. Life happens at its own time.

My next relationship will be my last. I am not looking. I am not worried. I am not rushing. I want this love to find me, learn me, want me, need me, and love me in slow motion. We have forever to go ♥

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Heal. Or Else, You Will Destroy Everything Around You.

Rooted in the past but with an eye to the future.

• Remain united with grace, compassion and love enveloped in your heart as closely as a drop of water is united with the bottomless ocean • Location: Phi Phi Island - Krabi, Phuket

Some times, we can be rooted in the past but with an eye to the future. All my past relationships have been lessons, not my forever punishment. The biggest lesson I learned in love and relationships is that #honesty saves everyone's time.

We all have hurt someone tremendously, whether by intent or accident. We all have loved someone tremendously, whether by intent or accident.

It is a human trait and deep responsibility. We make horrible mistakes. It is how we learn. We breathe in love. It is how we learn.

Love is fragile, much like us humans. We are not always the best caretakers of each other. No one heals themselves by wounding another.

Until you heal the wounds of your past, you are going to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, alchohol, drugs, work, cigarettes, sex, workouts, even pets and kids. But eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. Do not hurt others in an attempt to heal yourself. Do not sabotage your new relationship with your last relationship's poison. You have to be brave enough to open the wounds, stick your hand inside and pull out the core of the pain. Heal and grow.

My advice, if you truly want to add to the betterment of the world, do not add animosity or bitterness into a world already far too troubled by suffering and pain. Heal. Or else, you will destroy everything around you. Your trauma is not your fault, but your healing is your responsibility. Heal and grow.

Trust me, I have not been immune to life's tragedies and heartbreaks. I have a heart. It too hurts, bleeds, breaks and very much is flawed and broken and right now alone. However, in the end, I assume custodial responsibility for the maintenance of my own soul. I refuse to please others at the expense of my emotional well-being. It means saying no to the people who are used to hearing yes. I choose to be selfish. I choose self care. I choose my thoughts. I choose happiness.

You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.

I am in awe of the difficult moments life gives us and I am in awe of the beautiful ones. I am transfixed by growth. I have never been one to complain, even when things gnawed at me like a rat over the years, chewing perforations at my soul. I found that tears are my prayers for a montage of #gratitude... open gratitude for #celebration and thankfulness. Believe that things are good with you, and even if they are not, they will be soon enough.

Life is tough but so are you. Be kind to your body. To your mind. To your feelings. And be even kinder to your beautiful heart. Yes, it is necessary that you have to #reset, refocus. readjust. #Restart. As many times as you need to. Just never give up. Keep taking time for yourself until you are you again.

It is easy to settle and forget the kind of love we deserve. What does that kind of love look like? The love you deserve is what you are worth. You deserve someone who appreciates you for all that you are. Someone who will inspire you. Someone who will trust you enough to give you space to grow. Someone who pushes you to travel down a path of understanding, to be unashamed and to fill yourself with courage.

Relationships are a private love story and it is best to set your own terms. You have someone for a little while, then that person is gone. Do not waste the years locked in strife. No one can complete you, even if they wanted to. I was recently reminded I deserved the kind of love I want, one that is available and worth searching for, finding and keeping. I deserve what is best for me and that will look different than what anyone else has or wants. Although there may be jumping some hurdles to get there, fighting with tears and sadness, and probably, enduring a lot of nights alone... to stumble upon what you deserve, from there, the rest won't matter.

I believe it will come when the time is right. I deserve it. I am worth it.

Know that everything, even the greatest suffering and toil, even if they were to continue until the end of the world, will come to an end. For if you remain united with grace, compassion and love enveloped in your heart as closely as a drop of water is united with the bottomless ocean, we will find great joy returning to the the source of happiness.

You may not see it today or tomorrow, but you will look back in a few weeks, months, and years, and be absolutely perplexed and awed at how every little thing added up and brought you somewhere wonderful... where you always wanted to be. I moved because I thought I had to. I just realized that so much of the time that I was here, I was trying to convince myself that this was the place I was supposed to be. I do not feel that way any more. I feel like this is definitely where I am suppose to be ♥